My new friend!
Hey! Good morning! Guess what, I have a new friend! His name is Jean Claude, he works at the club downstairs, and instead of leaving work last night/this morning, he decided to stay awhile. I found him this morning on my way to work. Asleep on our stairs. Inside the building, not outside. And not asleep, no way! My buddy Jean was completely passed out and unresponsive to all my efforts to wake him. Because I am a good friend, these efforts included, but were not limited to: shaking, stomping on the stairs, smacking his face, grabbing his shoulders, pinching his nose and ears (gently, of course). Don't worry, I checked for his pulse, and he had one.
"Oh, buddy," I thought, (I didn't know his name yet, but already I felt so close to him) "Who are you, and why are you in such a state?" I got my roommate to come out of the apartment, and I called 311. Then they switched me to 911 and then to the EMS. Of course, my new friend roused himself as soon as I hung up with the EMS, and tried to go towards the door that leads into the club. It was locked, unlike our front door, which the club people always leave open, in case any visitors want to stop by unannounced. Poor Jean! He was glassy-eyed and unresponsive to our heartfelt inquiries as to why the fuck he was asleep in our building.
The cops/firetruck showed up, to make sure he was okay. He told them he works at the club and was working last night. Well, I think that's what he said, he didn't seem to speak much English. Another employee said, that yes, he worked last night, and had too much to drink! Oh the stresses of work, they can really get you down. The best thing to do is get completely wasted and pass out on my stairs. The cops said since he wasn't on the stairs when they showed up, they couldn't give him a ticket. He didn't have an ID, or know his address though, so that might prove a tough situation for him in the future.
Anyway, I finally left for work. It's fun to have a new friend sleepover on my stairs, not even 15 feet from my door, even though I don't know him and instead of being a small drunk wobbly man, could've been a huge violent burglar or some other type of scary man intent on hurting the girls that live on the first floor in an unlocked building. Whew! That was a close call. Thank God for Jean Claude!
"Oh, buddy," I thought, (I didn't know his name yet, but already I felt so close to him) "Who are you, and why are you in such a state?" I got my roommate to come out of the apartment, and I called 311. Then they switched me to 911 and then to the EMS. Of course, my new friend roused himself as soon as I hung up with the EMS, and tried to go towards the door that leads into the club. It was locked, unlike our front door, which the club people always leave open, in case any visitors want to stop by unannounced. Poor Jean! He was glassy-eyed and unresponsive to our heartfelt inquiries as to why the fuck he was asleep in our building.
The cops/firetruck showed up, to make sure he was okay. He told them he works at the club and was working last night. Well, I think that's what he said, he didn't seem to speak much English. Another employee said, that yes, he worked last night, and had too much to drink! Oh the stresses of work, they can really get you down. The best thing to do is get completely wasted and pass out on my stairs. The cops said since he wasn't on the stairs when they showed up, they couldn't give him a ticket. He didn't have an ID, or know his address though, so that might prove a tough situation for him in the future.
Anyway, I finally left for work. It's fun to have a new friend sleepover on my stairs, not even 15 feet from my door, even though I don't know him and instead of being a small drunk wobbly man, could've been a huge violent burglar or some other type of scary man intent on hurting the girls that live on the first floor in an unlocked building. Whew! That was a close call. Thank God for Jean Claude!
posted by Tete Rouge at 10:02 AM
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